Proof of Life: The Gift of the Pause

One of my Dear Sister-Friends gave me a much-needed reality check the other day. She said, “The last time we heard from you, you were down for the count after a bathroom fall. You left us hanging!” So, consider this my official update: I’m still here, and I’m finally finding my footing again.

I’ve learned more about whiplash and concussions in the last five weeks than I ever cared to know. Per doctor’s orders, I spent the first few weeks trying to be as still as possible. For a woman used to the freedom of my motorbike, the energy of the local markets, and the rhythm of the Sayan jungle, this created a severe case of Cabin Fever. There is a world of difference between choosing to stay home and being forced into stillness. If I had to name the single hardest time I’ve had since I moved to Bali, this recovery period was it. I had chronic neck and head pain day and night. Coupled with restlessness and irritability, it was a tough time. 

The Lesson of the Open Door

When the fall happened, I did what so many of us do: I tried to handle it alone. I asked my housekeeper, Madé, not to come that week.I just wanted to be alone. I told my neighbor and friend, Ketut, I was fine. They both gave me a raised eyebrow. 

But Bali has a different way of teaching you.

After a week of me insisting I was “fine,” Madé bypassed my defenses and my requests. She just showed up with food, water, and fresh vegetables. I felt a flood of emotions all at once.

Humbled because I couldn’t do it alone.

Grateful to be thought of.

Angry that I had been brought to this point.

Ketut even sent a local masseuse to my villa, assuming my injuries were muscular. As much as I love Balinese traditional massages, I had to decline. My nerves were like live wires. I was trying to avoid the heavy medications and let my body heal naturally, but that road was long, steep and slow. The doctor’s office kept a close watch on me and once I finished my prescribed medications, they sent a courier over with a bit more. 

In the meantime, my Baby Sister has stumbled onto Tokopedia. It is Indonesia’s version of Amazon. The benefit of receiving packages through Tokopedia is that it is an Indonesian company, so I do not have to pay import taxes and fees on them. A courier just delivers it to your door. During the time I was recovering, I received… not seven… not eight… not nine… but ten packages from Tokopedia!  All from Cheryl. Small, thoughtful dollops of sunshine to cheer me up when I was too sullen to admit I was melancholy. 

Steroids are common anti-inflammatories. But, over 5 weeks, with less movement and activity, they create weight gain! And opioids are very effective at pain management, but highly addictive. So, my mind was busy (over)analyzing every step of my treatment. 

Credit: Shutterstock

The Invisible Hit

Fun Fact that I didn’t know: you don’t actually have to hit your head to get a concussion. If you jerk your neck hard enough, in the way that  I did, the brain can collide with the skull just the same. So, there I was: researching, double-checking the doctors, and trying to manage my own care while reassuring family and friends back home that all was well.

But five weeks later, I can confidently say I am feeling much better. I can move my head freely again! The aches are just small reminders now. I am standing, chest out and chin up, in Divine Protection.

A Global Circle of Care

I also have to take a moment to look across the ocean. While I was tucked away in my Sayan sanctuary, my phone became a lifeline. To every one of you who called, messaged, or sent a wellness check, Thank You!  I know that not everyone could send a package or walk through my villa doors, but your energy traveled thousands of miles to reach me.

I heard you in Huntsville and Ireland. I felt the love from Cary, Fayetteville, Spring Lake, Laurinburg, Sanford, and more. You know who you are! In those moments when I felt the most isolated, those pings and voices reminded me that my circle is global. Your prayers and inquiries were the spiritual manna that kept my spirits up when the physical recovery felt too slow. You were part of my circle, even from afar.

The Law of Reciprocity

This time of rest wasn’t just a physical pause; it was a spiritual one. I had to stop all client work for Divine Soul Hypnotherapy. It is impossible and unethical to help others heal when you aren’t well yourself. As I’m still growing my practice, I’ll admit…I was scared. This was an unplanned interruption of my work and my anticipated income. 

But then I found the lesson. 

I learned that the Law of Reciprocity is real. And each of us plays both roles. It taught me that for the cycle of humanity to be complete, I have to take my turn as a Receiver as well as a Giver. It’s okay to let others see us when we’re vulnerable.

In the States, we’re surrounded by so many “takers”, that we feel compelled to repay every act of kindness immediately just to prove we aren’t one of them. But I saw that my Balinese friends took genuine pleasure in helping me. Madé cleaning the villa and Ketut fixing my towel rack and installing a handrail meant something to them to be a part of my circle. 

I stopped interrupting the blessing meant for them by finally learning how to graciously receive. In this case, freedom is not just about the motorbike and the waterfalls; it’s about the freedom to be vulnerable and still be a Queen.

I took one step closer to my version of Freedom. What does Freedom look like for you? 👑✨